Mindfulness.com
Meditation
See all Meditation

Browse

Top articles

How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners

10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation

What is Meditation?

Mindful LivingSleep
CommunityFor Work

00:00

00:00

Melli O'Brien

4.6

Duration

Scan the following QR code with your camera app to open it on your phone

Attend and Befriend

Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:

Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness.

Today we're going to talk about how we

can use a practice called attend and

befriend in times of fear or stress?

Now, lately, around the world,

most of us have been living with

a lot of uncertainty, and a pretty

big chunk of difficulty, too.

And for many of us, all that

uncertainty and kind of difficulty

translates to feelings of

anxiety, stress, and overwhelm.

Really what we're talking about here

is a lot of fear because stress and

anxiety are really code words for fear.

And fear is a powerful, psychological

and physiological response.

Our brains primary response

to fear is what we often

call fight or flight response.

And here's the thing, when that fight

or flight response is activated in our

brain, fear can actually take over.

It can hijack other areas of

the brain, making it really

difficult for us to be at our best.

When fear takes over, we become

emotionally reactive rather than rational.

We find it difficult to think clearly.

We often lose sight of the big

picture and problem solving for

the future becomes difficult.

So how can we self-regulate

in situations like this?

One way to bring those smart parts of

the brain back online and to soothe our

nervous system and regulate our emotions

is through this practice of attending to

and befriending our difficult emotions.

So let's give this a try together.

Now, just take a moment and think about

how fear, you might call it, stress or

anxiety have shown up in your life lately.

Just bringing that to mind.

And now just notice

where your mind has gone.

What kind of thoughts are arising?

And just noticing are these

thoughts, ones that have been

maybe coming up a lot lately.

And as these thoughts arise, just

noticing too, what emotions start to

rise up in response to those thoughts.

So just tuning into and actually

feeling those emotions for a moment.

So just noticing them attending to them.

And this is the first step to the

practice, to shift your attention out

of the thoughts and into the body,

into what you're actually feeling.

So if you could name this

feeling, what would you call it?

Is it sadness?

Is it stress?

Is it anxiety?

And just mentally now naming the emotion.

So you might be mentally saying to

yourself, Aah, I'm feeling anxiety.

Or, Ahh, I'm feeling stressed.

And the befriending part involves

the attitude to which we want

to attend to this feeling.

We want to attend to it with

compassion and kindness.

So can you bring the same attitude towards

your distress or pain that you might

bring to a loved one who was hurting?

So just attending to the feelings in

your body with a sense of kindness,

a sense of befriending it, rather

than rejecting it or pushing it away.

So when we attend and befriend like

this, we soothe our nervous system,

unhook ourselves from the fear

response and can become calm and

clear-headed in the middle of it all.

So just knowing that you can remember

this practice in times of fear or stress.

You can attend and befriend.

So as always, thank you for your

practice and your presence here with us.

I hope this practice is a great

support to you in the days to come.

And now let's settle in

for today's meditation.

Get Unlimited Access

Start your mindfulness journey today.

A Mindfulness Plus+ subscription gives you unlimited access to a world of premium mindfulness content.

  • Over 1,800 meditations, sleep, calm music, naturescapes and more
  • Daily mindfulness video meditations 365 days a year
  • 100s of courses and tools to help manage anxiety, sleep and stress

Get started today

Start your 7-day free trial
Or sign up with

Email Missing

We couldn’t detect your email with the SSO provider you have selected.
or

Mindfulness Guarantee

We are here to make a positive impact on the world. We never want to sell you something that hasn’t helped you live a better life. That’s why if you’re unhappy with any purchase from us, you have 30 days to get a full refund and your money back.

If you subscribed to Mindfulness Plus+ and are unhappy with your purchase, please get in contact with us within the 30-day period and we’ll refund your purchase.


Learn more about our Mindfulness Guarantee.

Mindfulness

Bring balance into your everyday life.

We believe in a world where everybody has access to the life-changing skills of mindfulness.

  • 2,000+ Guided Meditations
  • Daily Coaching
  • Sleep Content
  • Mindful Exercises
  • Mindful Radio
  • 10+ Courses from world-class teachers

Private Browsing

Added to your cart!

Checkout

Claim your free access

Create a mindfulness account and we’ll unlock this premium session in your account forever.

or continue with
By continuing, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy.

Do you already have an account?

Start a free trial to play this session

7-Days free trial, cancel anytime.

Finish personalizing your account

Complete a few quick questions to make your own personalized mindfulness plan.