Day 1 is about reframing how we approach things like disappointment, struggle, and self-development — and understanding how self-compassion is a key ingredient to deep-down transformation.

Notice what happens when you’re confronted with a situation that’s different than how you wish it were. This could be a moment of personal struggle, or a difficult relationship, or being faced with a challenge that feels overwhelming.

Pay attention to your body and what’s going on. You might feel upset, frustrated, or ashamed. You might feel your heart rate increase, a sinking feeling in your stomach, or the heat rise in your cheeks.

Now notice: What are the thoughts that jump into your head? What do you say to yourself? Is there a tendency to be hard on yourself?

What if you could gently interrupt these cycles of self-criticism in a way that could actually have an impact on the situations that are most frustrating for you?

Dr. Kristin Neff, in her research, discovered something surprising: when you respond to moments of disappointment, failure, and overwhelm with self-compassion, you actually get better results, like:

• Greater resilience
• Increased sense of wellbeing
• Better mental health
• Deeper connections with others
• Greater likelihood of positive change

According to Dr. Neff, self-compassion has three essential components: self-kindness, a sense of common humanity, and mindfulness.

Dr. Neff developed 3 simple steps to re-framing our view of ourselves and situations we wish were different by infusing them with genuine self-love.

They’re incorporated into this Self-Compassion Practice.

1. The first step is to acknowledge that we’re in pain.

We’re not resisting or contracting as a way to protect ourselves or to try and be “tough.” Instead, we’re real about what’s showing up for us in the present moment, without judgment, and say to ourselves or say aloud:

This is a moment of suffering.

It doesn’t matter what kind of difficulty you’re facing, when you simply acknowledge it and let it be there without trying to change it or push it away, you stop the struggle.

2. Next, we recognize that pain is universal.

Every human being experiences sadness, loss, disappointment, fear, worry, and shame. Remembering our common humanity can help awaken something bigger in us. We’re reminded that pain, no matter how personal, is not ours alone to carry.

Suffering is a part of life. I am not alone in feeling this way.

3. Finally, we extend kindness, caring, and soothing to ourselves.

You might even place your hands over your heart as you say:

May I be kind to myself. May I be kind to myself.

You can repeat these steps, saying the phrases as many times as you need for them to feel real to you.

If it feels right, you might also ask yourself what you need right now or what action you might take that would feel nourishing and helpful.

You can do this on your own anytime, of course. Or if you’d like a more structured practice to get you started, you can try one of the many guided self-compassion meditations inside the app, like the one below from Mindfulness.com teacher Melli O’Brien.