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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
Benefits of Mindfulness: Mindful Living Can Change Your Life
Mindfulness 101: A Beginner's Guide
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Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I'm going to be talking about how to be more equanimous with what other people say about you. Now, I will be the first to admit that this is not easy territory, because it seems like second nature that if a person says something good about us, then we will feel better about ourselves and kind of really hold onto those words and the perception of ourselves. At the same time, if someone says something about us that's more negative, we'll likely feel anger, resentment, resistance, or hurt. And, you know, we're also likely to really mull over those words and struggle with them in all kinds of ways.
We're probably also more likely to dislike the person who expressed the more negative view of us or our behavior. So we can become very emotionally thrown around by what other people say about us. We tend to often really cling to their words. But the reality is that words are just that, words. And we need not be so affected by them all the time.
So in meditation, as we train the mind, we start to get a lot better at becoming non-reactive to our thoughts. So instead of believing them, really being thrown around by them or playing them out, we learn not to take our thoughts so seriously and not take them so personally. Therefore we're really not so affected by them and we maintain more inner calm, steadiness and confidence. We also get better at working skillfully with thoughts. You know, we discern the difference between thoughts that are helpful, which we might choose to engage with and thoughts that are not so helpful, which we choose to let go.
Now we can extend this same kind of practice with the words of other people. We can recognize that, in the same way that thoughts come and go in the mind, the words of others will come and go in our lives. We really don't need to take them so seriously or personally. We don't need to buy into them or react to them. If they're helpful in some way, if they're nourishing to us, if they're empowering, we can engage with them.
If they're not so helpful, we can practice letting them go. We don't need to carry them with us. Now, of course, you might be thinking, gosh, you make it sound so easy to just let them go. But I assure you that with continued practice both in meditation and in daily life, we really can develop our ability to be non-reactive and at peace with ourselves and maintain confidence, no matter what anyone says. As the Buddha once said, "Praise and blame, gain and loss, pleasure and sorrow, they all come and go like the wind.
To be truly happy, learn to rest like a giant tree in the middle of them all." As always, thank you for your practice and your presence here. And let's settle in now for today's meditation.
Praise and Blame
Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:
Duration
Your default time is based on your progress and is changed automatically as you practice.
Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I'm going to be talking about how to be more equanimous with what other people say about you. Now, I will be the first to admit that this is not easy territory, because it seems like second nature that if a person says something good about us, then we will feel better about ourselves and kind of really hold onto those words and the perception of ourselves. At the same time, if someone says something about us that's more negative, we'll likely feel anger, resentment, resistance, or hurt. And, you know, we're also likely to really mull over those words and struggle with them in all kinds of ways.
We're probably also more likely to dislike the person who expressed the more negative view of us or our behavior. So we can become very emotionally thrown around by what other people say about us. We tend to often really cling to their words. But the reality is that words are just that, words. And we need not be so affected by them all the time.
So in meditation, as we train the mind, we start to get a lot better at becoming non-reactive to our thoughts. So instead of believing them, really being thrown around by them or playing them out, we learn not to take our thoughts so seriously and not take them so personally. Therefore we're really not so affected by them and we maintain more inner calm, steadiness and confidence. We also get better at working skillfully with thoughts. You know, we discern the difference between thoughts that are helpful, which we might choose to engage with and thoughts that are not so helpful, which we choose to let go.
Now we can extend this same kind of practice with the words of other people. We can recognize that, in the same way that thoughts come and go in the mind, the words of others will come and go in our lives. We really don't need to take them so seriously or personally. We don't need to buy into them or react to them. If they're helpful in some way, if they're nourishing to us, if they're empowering, we can engage with them.
If they're not so helpful, we can practice letting them go. We don't need to carry them with us. Now, of course, you might be thinking, gosh, you make it sound so easy to just let them go. But I assure you that with continued practice both in meditation and in daily life, we really can develop our ability to be non-reactive and at peace with ourselves and maintain confidence, no matter what anyone says. As the Buddha once said, "Praise and blame, gain and loss, pleasure and sorrow, they all come and go like the wind.
To be truly happy, learn to rest like a giant tree in the middle of them all." As always, thank you for your practice and your presence here. And let's settle in now for today's meditation.
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Vidyamala’s tips on catching anger as it’s happening or about to happen are great - clear, practical, and doable.
- Vicoir
The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
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Incredible, easy to navigate app. I would highly recommend this app to anyone who wishes to reduce stress and anxiety or simply as an aid to improve overall mental health.
- Kirtus
I love how the app gives me pointers to new things to explore.
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Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
Vidyamala’s tips on catching anger as it’s happening or about to happen are great - clear, practical, and doable.
- Vicoir
The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
- Lauren
Incredible, easy to navigate app. I would highly recommend this app to anyone who wishes to reduce stress and anxiety or simply as an aid to improve overall mental health.
- Kirtus
I love how the app gives me pointers to new things to explore.
- Lydia
So calm and soothing. I love the new bundle with Kelly Boys, she’s brilliant!
- EJ
Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
Vidyamala’s tips on catching anger as it’s happening or about to happen are great - clear, practical, and doable.
- Vicoir
The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
- Lauren
Incredible, easy to navigate app. I would highly recommend this app to anyone who wishes to reduce stress and anxiety or simply as an aid to improve overall mental health.
- Kirtus
I love how the app gives me pointers to new things to explore.
- Lydia
So calm and soothing. I love the new bundle with Kelly Boys, she’s brilliant!
- EJ
Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
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I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
-
I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
-
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