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How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
How to Meditate: Meditation 101 for Beginners
10 Science-Backed Benefits of Meditation
What is Meditation?
Benefits of Mindfulness: Mindful Living Can Change Your Life
Mindfulness 101: A Beginner's Guide
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Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I am going to talk about the importance of acknowledging and allowing subjective realities. So as we're going about daily life, we will very often be seeing things differently than other people do. And of course, this isn't natural. But the problem is, is that we tend to hold onto our viewpoints, our judgments, and our opinions about what's happening very tightly.
Now, when we get into a disagreement or a conflict, it's often the case that what is being argued about are actually two different viewpoints that are equally valid. And we just might not be hearing each other in that moment. Now, before I go any further here, I want to put an important caveat here. And the caveat is, is that in certain situations, it might not always be helpful to acknowledge subjective realities. For instance, racist, sexist, or extremist views that cause harm, violence or oppression to anyone are not okay.
You know, permission to have different points of view does not give anyone permission to cause harm or oppression. But a lot of the time, we may all see and experience things differently and a lot of misunderstanding can occur when we don't acknowledge people's subjective realities. Let's say a co-worker of yours comes in one day and looks at you a bit strangely. They don't smile at you. It's just kind of a dead pan stare.
Later in the day, after a meeting with you, they walk out of the office and slam the door loudly, which makes you jump a little bit. Now in that moment, you could be thinking to yourself that this person just doesn't like you, maybe that they're an angry person. You might even say something to them like, you don't have to be such a jerk or maybe you start to become shy and withdrawn around them because you believe that they don't like you. But the reality is, is that you don't know what that other person's experience actually is at this point. You're just assuming things about what's happening for them.
But if you went up and spoke to them and said, Hey, I noticed this morning that you looked at me without smiling, and then the door slammed quite hard after the meeting. And I feel a little worried. I'm wondering what's going on for you? Now that's really different to, you don't have to be a jerk or assuming this person doesn't like you and withdrawing from them. So see the difference? One is making an assumption or a judgment about what's happening without the full information. Whereas the other is just owning your experience and if necessary, inquiring about this.
So if we're going to speak to someone in these situations, it's best to try and use I statements and just speak about our own personal experience and feelings, and then being open to hearing the other. So the next time you find yourself feeling maybe resentful towards someone, or you end up in a conflict of some kind, just asking yourself, are you holding on too tight to your own viewpoint? Could you soften your assumptions a little and acknowledge the possibility of another person's subjective reality. I think you'll find if you can do that, you'll find more peace of mind and more fulfillment and ease in all of your relationships. So as always, thank you for your practice. Thank you for doing this work on yourself and in the world.
And now let's settle in for today's meditation.
Acknowledging Subjective Realities
Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:
Duration
Your default time is based on your progress and is changed automatically as you practice.
Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, I am going to talk about the importance of acknowledging and allowing subjective realities. So as we're going about daily life, we will very often be seeing things differently than other people do. And of course, this isn't natural. But the problem is, is that we tend to hold onto our viewpoints, our judgments, and our opinions about what's happening very tightly.
Now, when we get into a disagreement or a conflict, it's often the case that what is being argued about are actually two different viewpoints that are equally valid. And we just might not be hearing each other in that moment. Now, before I go any further here, I want to put an important caveat here. And the caveat is, is that in certain situations, it might not always be helpful to acknowledge subjective realities. For instance, racist, sexist, or extremist views that cause harm, violence or oppression to anyone are not okay.
You know, permission to have different points of view does not give anyone permission to cause harm or oppression. But a lot of the time, we may all see and experience things differently and a lot of misunderstanding can occur when we don't acknowledge people's subjective realities. Let's say a co-worker of yours comes in one day and looks at you a bit strangely. They don't smile at you. It's just kind of a dead pan stare.
Later in the day, after a meeting with you, they walk out of the office and slam the door loudly, which makes you jump a little bit. Now in that moment, you could be thinking to yourself that this person just doesn't like you, maybe that they're an angry person. You might even say something to them like, you don't have to be such a jerk or maybe you start to become shy and withdrawn around them because you believe that they don't like you. But the reality is, is that you don't know what that other person's experience actually is at this point. You're just assuming things about what's happening for them.
But if you went up and spoke to them and said, Hey, I noticed this morning that you looked at me without smiling, and then the door slammed quite hard after the meeting. And I feel a little worried. I'm wondering what's going on for you? Now that's really different to, you don't have to be a jerk or assuming this person doesn't like you and withdrawing from them. So see the difference? One is making an assumption or a judgment about what's happening without the full information. Whereas the other is just owning your experience and if necessary, inquiring about this.
So if we're going to speak to someone in these situations, it's best to try and use I statements and just speak about our own personal experience and feelings, and then being open to hearing the other. So the next time you find yourself feeling maybe resentful towards someone, or you end up in a conflict of some kind, just asking yourself, are you holding on too tight to your own viewpoint? Could you soften your assumptions a little and acknowledge the possibility of another person's subjective reality. I think you'll find if you can do that, you'll find more peace of mind and more fulfillment and ease in all of your relationships. So as always, thank you for your practice. Thank you for doing this work on yourself and in the world.
And now let's settle in for today's meditation.
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The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
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Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
Vidyamala’s tips on catching anger as it’s happening or about to happen are great - clear, practical, and doable.
- Vicoir
The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
- Lauren
Incredible, easy to navigate app. I would highly recommend this app to anyone who wishes to reduce stress and anxiety or simply as an aid to improve overall mental health.
- Kirtus
I love how the app gives me pointers to new things to explore.
- Lydia
So calm and soothing. I love the new bundle with Kelly Boys, she’s brilliant!
- EJ
Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
Vidyamala’s tips on catching anger as it’s happening or about to happen are great - clear, practical, and doable.
- Vicoir
The little talks before the meditations are priceless. It's like I've found my peeps. The topics, the quotes, the goals—it all makes so much sense to me, things I want to be thinking and learning about. Most importantly, the meditations are kindness-centered, which I love. It feels like a new way to approach meditation.
- Lauren
Incredible, easy to navigate app. I would highly recommend this app to anyone who wishes to reduce stress and anxiety or simply as an aid to improve overall mental health.
- Kirtus
I love how the app gives me pointers to new things to explore.
- Lydia
So calm and soothing. I love the new bundle with Kelly Boys, she’s brilliant!
- EJ
Better than Headspace. I've had the paid version of both apps, and I must say I enjoy this one better.
- Gina, Plus+ Member
I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
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I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
-
I am very new to meditation, and am so happy that my first introduction to it has been through this app
The first session was fantastic. I feel safe. And supported. Almost like having someone helping me through my difficult time. I’m very grateful for this app.
- Babi
You get a lot of useful tips for handling stress and anxiety in 'real life'.
- Joy
Highly recommend.
- Humanfrst
Kelly Boys is hands down the best. Everytime I click on one of her guided meditations I get excited for the calmness that lies ahead.
-
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