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Finding Your Querencia

Melli O'Brien



Melli O'Brien



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Finding Your Querencia

Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:

Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness.

Today I'm going to talk

about finding your querencia.

So what is a querencia?

In the dictionary, there are two

different meanings for this Spanish word.

And forgive me if my Spanish

pronunciation is not so good.

The first definition is that

your querencia is a place from

which your strength is drawn.

It's a place where you feel

safe and strong, where you're

your most authentic self.

But the other meaning of querencia,

where it's most commonly used, is

actually in reference to bull fighting.

So in bull fighting, it's believed that

in the midst of a fight, a bull can

find his own particular area of safety

in the arena and this is his querencia.

Once he's there, he can reclaim his

wits, find his strength and his power.

And he may only be there for a

few seconds, but those seconds

make all the difference.

So in bullfighting, as long as the

matador can keep the bull angry and

reactive continuously, he's in control.

But when that bull finds its querencia

and gathers his strength again,

from the matador's perspective,

he's in real trouble now because

the bull is really dangerous.

He's taken his power back and the

matador is no longer in control.

Now in the same way a bull takes

back his power when he takes a

pause to gather himself, so can we.

If we can learn to recognize and interrupt

our reactivity by taking a mindful

pause, then we tap back into presence

and all the qualities that come with

it, calm, clarity, wisdom, compassion.

At that point, we can break

out about old conditioning,

let go of emotional reactivity.

And then once we stabilize ourselves

in presence, then we can respond to

the situation in front of us with all

of our strength, wisdom, and power.

So if we get caught in an emotionally

charged situation, or we're just

feeling erratic, we're feeling kind

of overwhelmed, a good way to find

our querencia is just by taking

a couple of deep mindful breaths.

This calms the body and mind and

helps us become more present.

And if you're feeling really triggered

and reactive, it can be really

helpful to just take a time out.

Find a quiet, comfortable, safe

place where you can gather yourself

and center yourself in awareness.

Once you have done that, once you become

present, you can reflect on how you want

to respond to the situation at hand.

So this is the invitation to

practice today and ongoing.

Find your querencia.

Find your presence in the

moments when you need it.

And in this way, you reclaim your

power to live with intention,

authenticity and awareness.

As always, thank you for your practice

and your presence here with us.

And now let's settle in

for today's meditation.

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