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Melli O'Brien



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How We Heal Our Insecurities

Personalized support for learning how to integrate mindfulness into your life. Delivered fresh everyday by our world renowned experts. Choose meditation duration:

Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness.

Today we're going to talk about

how we can heal our insecurities.

Now, some people seem

really confident, right?

Like you might look at people on

social media looking really happy and

self-assured, and you would think to

yourself that they just don't experience

any sense of insecurity at all.

But if we look a little closer, we

see the same vulnerabilities and

insecurities exist within all of us.

And the reason for this basic

insecurity just has to do

with the way our mind evolved.

So we have the same basic needs is every

other animal on the planet, food, water,

shelter, reproduction, but none of

those things matter if you die, right?

So what's the number one

job of the human mind?

It's to stop you from dying.

And here's the thing, for humans

in more primitive times, fitting

in with the tribe or the group

was absolutely a survival need.

Humans did not survive alone.

They only survived in packs.

So if you got kicked out of the group,

if you got rejected, you're pretty much,

that pretty much means certain death.

Rejection meant death.

So if you ever noticed that

rejection feels like death?

This is why.

So, how does the mind go about making

sure that you always fit in with the pack?

Well, it compares you to everybody

else and assesses, you know.

Do they like me and my fitting

in, am I doing the right thing?

Am I contributing enough?

Am I offending anyone?

Am I good enough?

Does any of this sound familiar at all?

You know, these days our minds are

still doing the same thing, comparing

us to other people, assessing whether

we're measuring up, fitting, in doing

anything that could get us rejected

or have people look down on us.

And to make matters a lot worse these

days, instead of just comparing ourselves

to people in just our tribe, thanks

to the media and the internet, your

mind is now comparing you to a massive

amount of people in often in glossy

photo-shopped, you know, pictures.

So this constant comparison to so many

other members of the tribe at such

impossible standards, really aggravates

the conditioning of the human mind

and makes a lot of us feel, quite

frankly, that we're not good enough.

And this has a lot to do with

the huge rise in depression

across the world in recent years.

So what we're doing through mindfulness

is we're learning not to get rid of

thoughts and feelings of insecurity.

This is actually obviously very deep

conditioning of the mind and it will

likely always be there, but instead

we're changing the way we relate

to those thoughts and feelings.

We're learning to meet the insecurity

with kindness and understanding and

wisdom, just seeing it for what it is.

Some old conditioning in the mind doesn't

mean anything about your actual worth.

Of course it doesn't.

So these patterns of insecurity,

they kind of just become eventually

words and feelings that pass through

the mind, rather than something that

controls you, hurts you or limits you.

So as much as possible, rather

than believing in those thoughts of

deficiency or feelings of unworthiness,

see if you can take a step back

and rest in the wholeness and the

enoughness at the heart of who you are.

So I'll be guiding you through

more on how to let go of unhelpful

thoughts in today's meditation.

So, as always thank you for your

practice and for your presence here.

And I invite you to settle

in for today's practice.

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