The Wrong Side of Right

Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today, we're going to talk about being on the wrong side of right. So one big trap many of us repeatedly fall into when we're talking with others is focusing, in even just a subtle way, on proving ourselves to be right instead of focusing on achieving our true outcome in the moment. So while in our heart our true outcome might be, for instance, finding a solution to a problem, resolving an issue, learning to understand each other better, learning more about a particular topic, sometimes our ego gets in the way and just digs in its heels on proving its own point at any cost. That is what I would call being on the wrong side of right.

Once we start trying to prove ourselves right, we often lose touch with our true outcome. We might start to get very tense mentally and physically. That's always a sign. And we unconsciously hold onto any ideas and evidence that reinforces our own beliefs. And we dismiss anything that goes against it.

So in other words, we lose the ability to truly listen and be objective and learn. So when this happens, it is no longer about getting the true outcome anymore. It's about protecting and defending our ego. So when we're on the wrong side of right, arguments often ensue, resentments and distrust tend to build, disconnection often happens and we lose precious opportunities to solve problems, resolve issues, understand, grow, and connect with each other. So the next time you find yourself really feeling that urge to be right, see if you can pause for a moment and soften the need to be right.

And then connect with what your highest intention, your true outcome is in that moment. In other words, what is that intention, that deepest desire for that particular conversation. As Richard Carlson once said, "If you choose being kind over being right, then you'll be right every time." So thank you for your practice. I wish you well with this and let's settle in for today's meditation.