What We Can Learn From Anger

Hi, and welcome to your Daily Mindfulness. Today I'm going to talk about what we can learn from anger. So I'm just going to invite you to take a moment and remember the last time you felt angry. Maybe you had an argument with your spouse or you were angry about an injustice in the world, or perhaps somebody acted in a way that you found insensitive or rude. And as you bring this situation to mind, maybe you can remember what it was like to actually feel that anger in the body.

What sensations were there? Maybe there was a faster heartbeat, maybe tension in the jaw or shoulders, maybe feelings of hate or a rush of energy in the body. Maybe it was something totally different for you. So these sensations of anger, this is part of our body's fight or flight response. It alerts us that we feel threatened by something, or we don't feel safe. So the body's mobilizing energy in our bodies that really gets us ready to protect and defend ourselves.

So if you think about this and you look a little bit closer at anger, you can find that in any given moment, what you'll often find just below the surface of an angry moment is fear of some kind. So in an argument, maybe the other person said something that threatened our belief system or point of view. Or, maybe, you know, we were afraid of what would happen in the world if certain policies or changes were not made or were made, or maybe we got angry because of someone's remark because it touched on an insecurity or a vulnerability we have within ourselves. Our anger can often reveal some of our deepest fears and vulnerabilities. They can also teach us where we need to speak up, where we'd like to make a stand, where we need to put boundaries up to protect ourselves.

So it can be a really useful emotion. But right now I want to invite you to go back to that situation when you were angry. And as you hold that situation in mind, just inviting you to ask yourself, what might I have been afraid of in that moment or what might have made me feel a little threatened in that moment? So both fear and anger can be really powerful guides that inform us of what we need and what matters, but they can also, as most of us know, pull us into reactivity. But if we can learn to stay with the feeling before reacting, if we can meet it with compassion, equanimity, and objectivity, then we can grow in self-awareness and self-empowerment. So the next time you feel anger, arising in the body, see if you can take a pause and notice if there's fear underneath.

And if there is, try asking the fear what it needs. Is there something you need to do to look after yourself? Is there a vulnerability that needs to be tended to? Is there something that you can learn about yourself? And so in this way, we can learn to tend to our fear and anger with compassion and awareness. So as always, thank you for your practice and your presence here with us. And just inviting you now to settle in for today's meditation.