Hey, welcome back to

your Daily Mindfulness.

In today's session, we're going

to talk about non-attachment.

A very common refrain I hear from people

is Cory, I know the value of being

less attached, but how do I do it?

How do I practice non-attachment

so that I'm not gripping so hard to

things being the way I want them to be?

How do I practice non-attachment?

And my response is usually about

what they're looking to hear, but.

I don't actually believe we

can practice non-attachment.

All right.

So we'll just think

about it very logically.

If you want a piece of cake and you're

trying really hard to not want it,

well, the trying really hard to not want

it isn't going to serve you much, nor

will pretending that you don't want it.

You might end up convincing yourself

that you don't want it, but it

doesn't mean that you've cultivated

a mind that's non-attached and at

peace in relationship to that cake.

On some level, you're probably still

craving it and wishing you could eat

the cake and that's not non-attachment.

However, if, instead of trying to be

non-attached to the cake, you practice

paying very careful attention to how you

feel in the moments after eating the cake.

The quick high, the sugar crash, maybe

the bellyache or the unsatisfactoriness

of good taste just coming and going

quickly and not giving permanent joy.

Well, when you do that, you're now helping

your mind learn that this piece of cake,

which we think is bringing us so much,

joy might actually be leading to some

distress, a little bit of discomfort.

Maybe even some suffering,

even if just on a subtle level.

This approach of learning about the

experience, really dropping into the

actual elements of the experience

and where it might be creating some

distress is very different than trying

to convince yourself that you don't

want something that you really do want.

So as you consider cultivating a mind

that is more equanimous, more balanced and

less attached to having things, or things

being a certain way, perhaps instead focus

on what it feels like to be attached.

Feel the pain that comes with gripping on

to things, things needing to be the same

way all the time, wanting to have things.

Trying to not be attached as it's

still a form of attachment, because

now we're wrestling with the very

thing we're trying to be at peace with.

True non-attachment only comes from the

mind's deep understanding that staying

attached is causing more suffering.

Only when it understands that

will it starts to, re start to

release its grip, and that's a

process that happens organically.

So we'll explore some more

of this in the meditation.

But as you go throughout your day, try to

bring this perspective and awareness into

your moments and see how it softens your

relationship to the things you most want.

I'll talk to you shortly.

Until then, take care.